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Recognizing Defenses :: Class 1: Recognizing Distant Defense Style
Distant Defense Styles are the result of denying both our masculine and feminine sides.Ironically, this generates a superficial emphasis on gender roles, such as being a good provider, nurturer, or both. We can recognize this type of individual because of their desire for consistency, even though they, themselves, may be inconsistent. They can be identified by how they operate at a fixed distance from people to maximize comfort. This is because physical distance indicates how safe they feel. Distant people are primarily motivated by Excitement, which means they are fantasy focused, and want more respect and esteem, but feel they must work for it. They typically have minimal expectations and tend to deny outer needs for fear of how others might react to them.
As Distant individuals, we demonstrate strength in thinking (as an experiential modality) but vacillate in our Sensations, Feelings and Emotions, not believing they are critical to having a complete experience. Our primary fear is not being wanted, which means we do not want to impose ourselves on others. This creates a sense of isolation and reinforces familial connections, even if these connections are not great. We are most influenced by Objectification patterns where outer appearances and looking good falsely indicate our internal states of being. We accept authority, but freeze when challenged. We want to negotiate every problem, but do not expect any real answers to emerge. This is because we are anchored in certain activities that we repeat constantly, even when they are not necessary. We are sensitive to guilt, being judged and react quickly with avoidance behaviors when attacked. We validate the truth by what we can physically see.
Distant individuals seek beauty, but do not want to be at the effect of it. The challenge is to clarify our personal Intent. The problem is that we tend to react when others try to tell us what to do. We have difficulty relaxing. Our sense of safety comes from habits or daily rituals where things do not change too much. We hate jealousy but end up being very attached to certain individuals. When we get overwhelmed, we make unilateral decisions that deny input from others. We are selective about our commitments. We have difficulty making public mistakes and try to ignore any discussion about them. In this course we talk about how physically close to operate with Distant individuals. Through the review of hundreds of pictures, we explore the various physical and energetic characteristics that indicate a Distant Defense Style Our objective is to offer enough examples so we will be able to see these characteristics in life. The class also comes with all presentations (in PDF format) and video recordings.
Facilitators: Larry Byram & Sandra Jaquith
Class Schedule: Thursday, June 21, 2018, 6-9pm MT
Location: 2945 Center Green Court, Ste. E, Boulder, CO 80301 (or by webinar)