Recognizing Defenses :: Class 4: Recognizing Disnamic Defense Style
Disnamic Defense Style individuals jump back and forth between feminine and masculine expressions. It is only when we are Pioneering that we can do the two simultaneously. Disnamic individuals shift back and forth because in their formative years each parent had a different Defense. In order to be seen, they learned to complement each parent by being each one’s mirror image. They are easily identified, because when we engage them in soft ways, they respond with strength, and vice versa. Their goal is to always create a full picture of all sides of a situation so better decisions can be made. Problems arise when they are in groups where some individuals expresses dynamic defense while others express disarming or distant defense. This context is difficult for the dysnamic individual who feels pulled to express several opposing defenses simultaneously and creates friction in their ability to meet the needs of everyone at the same time. They become agitated when they cannot mirror or include thinking and emotional states simultaneously. To accomplish this, they need to take ownership of having both masculine and feminine sides. Otherwise, they incorporate elements of Disarming and Dynamic defenses that are in conflict with each other.
Our biggest fear is that no one will know us as we are. This is because we see ourselves as chameleon, changing our color depending on the circumstances. We see value in counterbalancing and completing others. We need to learn how to do this within ourselves. In addition to reconciling the masculine and feminine polarity, we need to also reconcile interior and exterior experiences. This is the polarity issue between Dynamic (interior) and Disarming (exterior) defense experiences. We become Pioneers when our interior and exterior become fully interrelated and conscious. Disnamic Defense Styles are the most adaptive, translating their experiences between Esteem and Respect or Aliveness and Wisdom. We are most influenced by the Defensive Distortions of our partners. We need to accept that our Motives and Beliefs can be flexible and not fixed.
The source of Defensive Healing is the rebalancing of Aliveness, Wisdom and Awareness. On a defensive level, choosing someone with the same patterns initially feels uncomfortable. This is because we have not yet accepted our own Being on a larger level. Not only does our Defense minimize our creativity, it also makes us question why being with this person would be a smart idea. The answer is that until we can be with others who are like us, we are unable to accept our own wholeness. When we can be seen and accepted by others like ourselves, we naturally strengthen rather than drain each other. It also makes it possible to not have to endlessly explain ourselves to others (because of defensive differences). Disnamic Defense is the easiest to heal, when we seek clarity, to facilitate being a Pioneer.
Facilitators: Larry Byram & Sandra Jaquith
Class Schedule: Thursday, August 16, 2018, 6-9pm MT
Location: 2945 Center Green Court, Ste. E, Boulder, CO 80301 (or by webinar)