Creative Assessments are ways we honor our differences. Each Compatibility Factor identifies a range of choices that can help us to see why we are not accepted or understood for who we are. This month the Creative Assessment Party is for couples so they can share the experience and work with each other from an equal level. We will summarize the differences and similarities of each couples’ mini-compatibility factors. Larry will also identify the major challenge in the relationship related to Objectification, Subjectification, or Idealization.
At our assessment parties we cover seven factors that most impact relationship choices. While we do try to be 85% accurate on pictures, and 90-95% accuracy in person, there are challenges. The reason our coaches are more accurate is they have cleared their own parental distortions and are not projecting them on their clients. Sometimes clients are not able to support the process because of contradictory beliefs they hold from childhood. Any confusion we may experience also limits our ability to accurately see others.
The value of doing a Creative Assessment is that it allows us to identify where are aligned to or similar to someone. This can lead to working more effectively with our partners. When someone is similar to us, it does not require much work to explain ourselves. The issue is about loving ourselves as we are because it allows us to see and engage those who are most able to love us. Many of us look for partners who match our parental patterns which is why we use Excitement, Intensity and Anxiety to determine which partners will be the most willing to compromise themselves for us. This promotes Co-Dependent choices over Co-Creative ones.
There is even a value in identifying our differences, as this can lead to discovering better ways to operate together. For example, if we know our partner’s first level of communication is Think-First, and we are Feel-First, it would be best to engage the Think-First with information or Content. We can ask them if they want to talk about a particular topic, how much time they have, and the bullet points we think should be covered. We complete this communication by asking when they would like to make a decision (because they are time centered). This gives a Think-First individual time to prepare and allows the Feel First person to organize their information so the Think-First partner can quickly validate it. Since a Think-First person seeks Truth and a Feel-First individual seeks harmony, the Feel-First individual can create more truth by being consistent and declarative in their harmony.
This is just one example of differences we see between individuals around how they communicate. Understanding the full range of communication options empowers us to recognize what is needed in different situations. In our Mini Creative Assessment process, we discuss the seven differences in Communication style, Decision-Making, Defense Styles, Pacing differences and the three levels of creative archetypes. We not only combine these assessments individually, but discuss the differences in the group so people can see how each factor honors their natural way of Being. The more we understand what makes us powerful contributors, the easier it is to find partners and authentic work that is aligned with us.
Only 10 couples will be able to participate in this Creative Assessment process. This is a special event to support couples to engage the Creative Discovery process. This allows us to customize the conversation so people can learn the most in the least amount of time. We will send out presentations and recordings of the event. Videos taken will not show individual participants. It is on a first come, first served basis.